


“happy d-day”

by wildhoneypot



Category: Gorillaz
Genre: 2Russ - Freeform, 2d has a mood disorder ok, Dialogue Heavy, Hurt/Comfort, Other, Phase 5, and roto is probably full of lies, cw addiction mention
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-17
Updated: 2018-08-17
Packaged: 2019-06-28 20:05:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,054
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15714156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wildhoneypot/pseuds/wildhoneypot
Summary: 2d thinks about d-day, russ thinks about 2d





	“happy d-day”

“Why is this a holiday to people?!”

  
2d was going off again, Russel was letting him.

  
“ ‘ _Happy D-Day’.._ ~~~~ ~~~~” he sucked his teeth. “What the fuck does that mean?!”

  
It was still strange to him to hear 2d curse.

  
“What the fuck- what the fuck does that mean?!” ‘ _Congratulations On Being Fucked Up_!!!’” he pitched his voice up and waved his hands around mockingly.

  
It was strange to see him so animated, too.

  
“ _Happy Anniversary Of Becoming Worse Than You Already Were!!!! Hahahahaha!!!!_ ”

  
Russel waded through enough of 2d’s “@“s this morning to get it.

“Why did we write that down?! Why- why did we just let people in on that?! Why did we make shit up?! What- fuck! Do you know what I mean?! I don’t understand!”

It’s become a routine for the past few weeks. Wait for 2d to offer him a smoke, find the way to the roof, get comfortable, enjoy the show. Even if 2d seems _bolder_ or _weirder_ to everyone else, Russel’s still the only one who gets to hear him truly go off. He’s figured it’s better to just sit there and listen. He felt like he owed him, like he was finally paying back a favor. For the god knows how many times he’s secretly cried into D’s chest. All the times he vented to him with his teeth clenched, screamed to him about his own hang ups. Every “ _talk to me_ ”, every _“it’s okay_ ”. He figured it was the least he could do at this point, because he didn’t know how he was feeling. Other than worried. Not like he can never find anything to say, anyway. 2d’s rants usually get to the point where he doesn’t make much sense. All of his thoughts spill out at once and fight each other. Some bite the ones that come before them and swallow them whole. He sighed watching his hands fly around.

“It doesn’t matter what I do! I’m trying to move _on_! It’s like I’m nothing besides all the bad shit that happens to me. Or whatever that off-brand demon does to me.” Russel watched him pull a cigarette from behind his ear, his natural dark roots were growing in again. “Or all the stupid shit I do.”

  
2d kept flicking the lighter well after the cigarette was lit.

  
“And it all kicks off with my stupidest thing, I didn’t move out the fucking way.” his last couple of words were cut off by him taking a drag.  
“Is ‘stupidest’ a word?” he started drawing circles on the side of his forehead.  
“I-“  
“Never mind, I don’t care.”  
He took another drag as he started pressing harder onto his forehead. “It’s like I can’t- oh!”

Whatever he was thinking was cut off by him holding his head.

  
“Hey, sit down.” Russel stroked 2d’s arm, trying to pull him towards himself.  
“I don’t want to sit down.” 2d snapped back through his teeth, eyelids still squeezed together. Russel let 2d shake off his arm. Even though 2d accepted defeat and slumped down beside him. He crouched over, resting his head in his arms.

He hasn’t been taking anything for pain. Another thing Russel didn’t know how to feel about. He remembers how proud he was of 2d when he confirmed, _‘I ain’t on shit!_ ’, when people kept bothering him about Sleeping Powder. He’s used to seeing people talk about “getting their friend back” in corny advertisements. He was always annoyed about how people pretended after that, everything is over. 2d’s always been 2d. It’s just taking him longer to bounce back from things that happen to him. And he knows it.

And Russel hates it.

He knows how he feels about everything, he _hates_ it.

He hates how 2d feels like he has to rant in private, he hates that he has to hide his feelings in lyrics and behind jokes. He hates how no one can tell when he’s joking. He hated seeing him nod through pain in the past, but he hates how he just makes himself deal with it now. He hates that he refuses to take anything at all, even if it will help him, even vitamins. He hates how 2d just.. accepts the state of disrepair he’s in, he hates that he jokes about dying. He hates how he doesn’t sing around the house anymore. He hates the delusions of power people still have over him. He hates how people brush off 2d’s moods, he hates how people acted the same way about him. He hates how there’s a day to mark where all of this started.

“Hey, I’m sorry.”  
Russel shook his head. “What did you do?”  
“I always think I’m yelling with you and I’m just yelling at you.”  
“This is how you vent, you’re clearing the air.”  
“You’re not a therapist. I see how you never talk whenever I do this. I’m yelling at you.” 2d said, tossing the cigarette.  
Russel took his hand. “Well, it’s okay.”

  
2d tightened the grip and rubbed Russel’s hand with his thumb.

  
“I’m just tired. It’s been same thing over and over. Ever since, ugh, ‘ _D-Day_ ’. But, we’re all tired.”  
“ ‘ _D-Day._ ’ “ Russel mocked along with him.

He heard 2d snort.

“What was that?” 2d laughed.  
“Same shit you were doing?!”  
“I guess.”

Russ bumped him with his shoulder. 2d faked a scoff and bumped him back.

“You know what?”

  
Russ wanted to answer ‘what?’, but knew 2d was going to continue anyway. He watched him hop to his feet. Free hand on his hip as if he was about to hurt someone’s feelings. 2d pulled a second cigarette from behind his other ear and lit it like it was nothing. Wonderful, something new for Russ to worry about.

  
“You know what..?” he repeated, sounding like he was proofreading his next thought. Looking at nothing in particular.  
“What is it?”  
“I got to meet you, so it’s alright.” he bent down quickly and pecked Russel’s cheek. “I’m going to bed.”

He remembered they were still holding hands and slowly stepped back to let their fingers unwind. He smiled as their hands kept touching until they couldn’t anymore.

  
“I’m going to bed.” he said again, his voice finally relaxed.

Russel couldn’t help but smile back.

  
“I heard you, honey. I’ll see you in a minute, okay?”

 


End file.
